Yesterday was about what to say. Today is about something even more useful: knowing how you'll leave. Many people in recovery go to weddings, parties, and work events and do fine. Some do fine for two hours and then find themselves in trouble at hour three, when the room is louder, people are drunker, and the old pull is stronger. The safest time to plan your exit is before you arrive.
An exit plan is simple. Drive yourself, or have a ride you control, so you're never stuck waiting on someone who's drinking. Decide in advance roughly how long you'll stay. Tell one person — someone at the event, or a friend on the phone — that you might need to text them. And give yourself permission, ahead of time, to go the moment it stops feeling okay, without needing a reason and without an elaborate goodbye.
A lot of people feel that leaving early is rude or a sign they can't handle it. Neither is true. You showed up. You were present for the part that mattered. Leaving when you need to isn't weakness. It's judgment, and judgment is what keeps you going to the next one.
✦ Quote
"The better part of valour is discretion."
— William Shakespeare, Henry IV, Part 1 (Falstaff)
◎ Prompt
For your next event, write your plan on three lines: how you're getting there and home, what time you'll check in with yourself about leaving, and who you'll text if it gets hard.
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